Premiership Winners & Losers
Winners
Manchester City
Top of the league, and a win over United. Does it get much better? As predicted by The Late Flag, Eriksson's side aren't the most free-flowing or highly scoring side in the league, but when you've not conceded a goal all season, you're certainly not doing too badly as long as you know where the goal is. A home game against Derby and a deflected effort against their local rivals has meant that despite their lack of real cutting edge, City have used this week to make it 9 out of 9 so far.
Chris Hutchings
"I've got a tenner here somewhere" was his response when told he was favourite to be the first Premiership manager to lose his job. Middlesbrough's general s**t-ness and Sunderland's defensive ineptitude has surely cost him that tenner now, 6 points from the first 9 should make him unsackable for a few weeks yet. Impressive industry from Wigan though, as Sibierski and Heskey have the look of an unexpectedly successful partnership. Whilst many could use the quality of their opposition as a mitigating factor in their success, it should be remembered that 14th would be seen as a good year for Wigan, and they're beating their relegation rivals. On this form they could finish top of that bottom third.
Tottenham
Typical. I go slagging off Spurs, their midfield, and Jermaine Jenas, and they win 4-0 with 3 goals coming from midfielders...one from the waste of space himself. I should have seen this coming, but they've rammed my criticism back down my throat, at least for a week. I wouldn't be fooled though, they're still short of midfield quality.
Portsmouth
An assured performance against a Bolton side as desperate for a result as Spurs were. This weekend could well have been a bad time to play Sammy Lee's side, with a backlash in the offing. But despite going a goal down, they fought back to win comfortably, and in Utaka, seem to have a real find. He certainly scored goal of the week, and looked tricky throughout.
Reading
4 points from a run of Manchester United, Chelsea and Everton has to be seen as a good haul. They worked hard for their win, and despite riding their luck at times, were probably good value for it. On the evidence they've shown so far, they'll be absolutely fine this season.
Alan Curbishley
Eased the pressure with a just-about-deserved 1-0 victory. I'm still not convinced it was a penalty, but on the balance of play they probably did enough to deserve 3 points. Clearly his rebuilt side needs more time to bed together, and a few more decisions like that one will help them no end.
Chelsea
Got absolutely nothing out of the Liverpool defence, but came away from Anfield with a priceless point thanks to the most inept refereeing decision of the weekend. Bearing in mind Fulham's disallowed goal, that's saying something. Must be loving Man Utd's slow start.
Middlesbrough
Nearly as lucky as Chelsea. In fact, when you factor in Mido's goal, probably the luckiest side this weekend, having been largely outplayed by Fulham. A much-needed win though, that could kickstart their season.
Dirk Kuyt & Fernando Torres
Showing signs of becoming the best strike partnership in the country. Their industry, movement and link-up play were once again a joy to behold, and despite the hard work of their defensive colleagues, could justifiably claim to be the Liverpool players most unlucky not to be on the winning side. Despite Benitez' many options, these two will be hard to drop on this performance.
Losers
Manchester United
Dear oh dear, not a striker in sight. It just keeps getting worse for the Champions, one goal in three games is a very poor show, and losing to their resurgent City rivals must have hurt like hell. Especially since they hardly had a shot. When Richard Dunne keeps your £30m-rated striker in his back pocket, you know you've got problems.
Derby County
Absolutely battered by Spurs. Will have to learn very, very quickly that giving Premier League midfielders 30 yards of space will cost you dear. Perhaps they were worried by the pace of Bent & Keane in behind them, but whatever the reason, dropping that deep and refusing to put pressure on the ball in their own half played into Spurs' hands. They don't need creative midfielders when you give them that much space - David Batty and Carlton Palmer could have carved Derby open on Saturday.
Bolton
Still no points, and still no sign of getting any. Anelka looks their only threat, and he could be off before September. Unless they re-invest that money VERY wisely, a long hard winter could be on the cards. Strangely for Bolton, they look wide open at the back, too.
Fulham
Your newest signing dislocates his shoulder, your goalscorer dislocates his knee, your keeper does a Taibi, and Healy has that goal disallowed. It's just not your week lads, no matter how well you played. After the Arsenal game last week, Sanchez must regret p**sing on that ancient Indian burial ground.
Sunderland
Temporarily losing a centre back to a head injury is always a difficult time. Replace him, or hope your team holds out till he comes back on? A dilemma. But when your full-back filling in at centre half gives away a penalty a minute later, there's only one decision - get a proper replacement on. When that replacement soon concedes a penalty himself, however, it's time to pack it all in and head home with your tail between your legs. Especially when you've only been playing Wigan, hardly the Real Madrid of the Premier League.
Jens Lehmann
How not to answer your critics.
The B***ard in the Black (or green, yellow, or whatever the f**k they wear)
The controversial penalties at St Andrews and Anfield have put referees firmly back in the spotlight, a hell of a lot earlier than they'd have hoped. There was also the disallowed goal at Fulham, and already video technology is being mooted again as a way to save us from their bumbling lunacy. Not how you'd want to start a season really.
My Fantasy League Team (again)
Ronaldo's red card and suspension, Bojinov injured after finally starting a game, that t**t Zamora getting a game ahead of Ashton, Arteta's form evaporating when I sign him...I really have had the Manchester United of Fantasy League starts. I'll have to give myself a vote of confidence soon. I'd like to apologise to the fans, the performance this week just wasn't good enough.
Manchester City
Top of the league, and a win over United. Does it get much better? As predicted by The Late Flag, Eriksson's side aren't the most free-flowing or highly scoring side in the league, but when you've not conceded a goal all season, you're certainly not doing too badly as long as you know where the goal is. A home game against Derby and a deflected effort against their local rivals has meant that despite their lack of real cutting edge, City have used this week to make it 9 out of 9 so far.
Chris Hutchings
"I've got a tenner here somewhere" was his response when told he was favourite to be the first Premiership manager to lose his job. Middlesbrough's general s**t-ness and Sunderland's defensive ineptitude has surely cost him that tenner now, 6 points from the first 9 should make him unsackable for a few weeks yet. Impressive industry from Wigan though, as Sibierski and Heskey have the look of an unexpectedly successful partnership. Whilst many could use the quality of their opposition as a mitigating factor in their success, it should be remembered that 14th would be seen as a good year for Wigan, and they're beating their relegation rivals. On this form they could finish top of that bottom third.
Tottenham
Typical. I go slagging off Spurs, their midfield, and Jermaine Jenas, and they win 4-0 with 3 goals coming from midfielders...one from the waste of space himself. I should have seen this coming, but they've rammed my criticism back down my throat, at least for a week. I wouldn't be fooled though, they're still short of midfield quality.
Portsmouth
An assured performance against a Bolton side as desperate for a result as Spurs were. This weekend could well have been a bad time to play Sammy Lee's side, with a backlash in the offing. But despite going a goal down, they fought back to win comfortably, and in Utaka, seem to have a real find. He certainly scored goal of the week, and looked tricky throughout.
Reading
4 points from a run of Manchester United, Chelsea and Everton has to be seen as a good haul. They worked hard for their win, and despite riding their luck at times, were probably good value for it. On the evidence they've shown so far, they'll be absolutely fine this season.
Alan Curbishley
Eased the pressure with a just-about-deserved 1-0 victory. I'm still not convinced it was a penalty, but on the balance of play they probably did enough to deserve 3 points. Clearly his rebuilt side needs more time to bed together, and a few more decisions like that one will help them no end.
Chelsea
Got absolutely nothing out of the Liverpool defence, but came away from Anfield with a priceless point thanks to the most inept refereeing decision of the weekend. Bearing in mind Fulham's disallowed goal, that's saying something. Must be loving Man Utd's slow start.
Middlesbrough
Nearly as lucky as Chelsea. In fact, when you factor in Mido's goal, probably the luckiest side this weekend, having been largely outplayed by Fulham. A much-needed win though, that could kickstart their season.
Dirk Kuyt & Fernando Torres
Showing signs of becoming the best strike partnership in the country. Their industry, movement and link-up play were once again a joy to behold, and despite the hard work of their defensive colleagues, could justifiably claim to be the Liverpool players most unlucky not to be on the winning side. Despite Benitez' many options, these two will be hard to drop on this performance.
Losers
Manchester United
Dear oh dear, not a striker in sight. It just keeps getting worse for the Champions, one goal in three games is a very poor show, and losing to their resurgent City rivals must have hurt like hell. Especially since they hardly had a shot. When Richard Dunne keeps your £30m-rated striker in his back pocket, you know you've got problems.
Derby County
Absolutely battered by Spurs. Will have to learn very, very quickly that giving Premier League midfielders 30 yards of space will cost you dear. Perhaps they were worried by the pace of Bent & Keane in behind them, but whatever the reason, dropping that deep and refusing to put pressure on the ball in their own half played into Spurs' hands. They don't need creative midfielders when you give them that much space - David Batty and Carlton Palmer could have carved Derby open on Saturday.
Bolton
Still no points, and still no sign of getting any. Anelka looks their only threat, and he could be off before September. Unless they re-invest that money VERY wisely, a long hard winter could be on the cards. Strangely for Bolton, they look wide open at the back, too.
Fulham
Your newest signing dislocates his shoulder, your goalscorer dislocates his knee, your keeper does a Taibi, and Healy has that goal disallowed. It's just not your week lads, no matter how well you played. After the Arsenal game last week, Sanchez must regret p**sing on that ancient Indian burial ground.
Sunderland
Temporarily losing a centre back to a head injury is always a difficult time. Replace him, or hope your team holds out till he comes back on? A dilemma. But when your full-back filling in at centre half gives away a penalty a minute later, there's only one decision - get a proper replacement on. When that replacement soon concedes a penalty himself, however, it's time to pack it all in and head home with your tail between your legs. Especially when you've only been playing Wigan, hardly the Real Madrid of the Premier League.
Jens Lehmann
How not to answer your critics.
The B***ard in the Black (or green, yellow, or whatever the f**k they wear)
The controversial penalties at St Andrews and Anfield have put referees firmly back in the spotlight, a hell of a lot earlier than they'd have hoped. There was also the disallowed goal at Fulham, and already video technology is being mooted again as a way to save us from their bumbling lunacy. Not how you'd want to start a season really.
My Fantasy League Team (again)
Ronaldo's red card and suspension, Bojinov injured after finally starting a game, that t**t Zamora getting a game ahead of Ashton, Arteta's form evaporating when I sign him...I really have had the Manchester United of Fantasy League starts. I'll have to give myself a vote of confidence soon. I'd like to apologise to the fans, the performance this week just wasn't good enough.
4 comments:
Andy S
Lol, your scathing comments would be more believeable if your fantasy team didn't make you look like you couldn't find your backside with both hands and a map.
Having said that I don't disagree with a word said, and the complete lack of mention of Toon v Villa was what that game deserved! (plus my fantasy teams are having their asses handed to them aswell, all 4 of them :-( )
Yeah, lets not get carried away here - you're only about 3 points ahead of me aren't you? God, we suck. But it's ok, I've bought a new striker now, things are going to be fine from here on in. (yeah, right...)
I was going to put "Newcastle season ticket holders" in the losers section after the bore-fest that was Saturday evening, but I think it's a bit early to judge fat sam just yet. You never know, he may have a plan B. You want to hope so at least, if he really thinks Martins is a wide player then you'll be in for more of the same. Do you even *have* a right winger anymore?
Anyway, you can't really blame me for the failure of my team so far - who'd have thought Curbishley would pick Zamora ahead of Ashton? I mean, why??
"But it's ok, I've bought a new striker now, things are going to be fine from here on in." Sir Alex is wishing he could say that....linked with oba this morn, not the answer to their probs 4 me - they need a target man.
Right winger - milner (whose being played on the left so we can play oba on the right - should change now owens back we'll play 442)
Finally I take it back, I'm top of the Metro fantasy league I'm in. the others are wank. No one can catch andy's "Roy Keane Anks his dog....Rovers" now!
"Anyway, you can't really blame me for the failure of my team so far" - ah the Glenn Roeder approach to fantasy football
Yeah, after I'd wrote it I remembered that Milner is comfortable on either flank. So I assume 4-4-2 would involve Enrique at left-back, N'Zogbia on the wing and Milner over to the right? It seems a bit strange though, you had all sorts of midfield options last season, and now you're one injured winger short of a crisis...your team would look very unbalanced if N'zogbia was to get crocked again.
Which brings me neatly to Glenn Roeder. Ok, he used injuries as an excuse, but frankly, when you line up with Babayaro and Bramble in your back four, you deserve everything you get. But you can't tell me that McCarthy's concussion, Bojinov royally f**king his knee up, or Curbishley being a complete twat with regards to Ashton is my fault. Neither is Ronaldo's headbutt...I think things will be fine this year once everything's calmed down. Benni will be back on the goal trail before you know it, Zamora can only get a game for so long before he exposes himself as the useless c**t that he is, and Steve Gerrard, Gerrard will be carrying me to the top of the table within weeks. Then I'll be back to shove that Roeder comparison so far down your throat the West Ham faithful will be singing offensive cancer songs up your rectum.
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